All About Postpartum & My Experience

Postpartum is one of the important topics I want to talk about in the journey of motherhood. 

Even though it’s getting better and people are getting aware about postpartum, I don’t think we talk about it enough and understand it well. 

I have to confess I don’t think I have understood it well or have answers for all the questions and things that postpartum have. 

But, I would love to start the conversation, hear from you, and learn from each other’s experiences so that we could make postpartum a little easier.  

Let me start by telling my story. 

I gave birth to my first child in the middle of the Coronavirus pandemic. It is not even in the middle where we know better about the new virus, it was at the start of the pandemic I would say. It was mid-March 2020. 

The state we are living in, Texas, got a lockdown measure when I was in the hospital. We weren’t following the news as I was in labor. Do you know who told us the state is in lockdown? families from Ethiopia. 

It was such a crazy time!! We don’t know what a lockdown means. Seriously, we didn’t know what was waiting for us!! 

I will tell my birth story in another post. Here I will just focus on postpartum. So after I gave birth to my baby and after we left the hospital, we started learning about the pandemic and what lockdown means. 

It was confusing (at least for me) and so much uncertainty. As the day went by, the fear and tension grew dramatically. Friends stop coming to our home. All the travel plans that our families had to visit us got canceled. Going out for grocery shopping was scary. Thank God we live in a country where we can get home delivery. My heart goes out to the women who gave birth at the same time as I am and struggles with all the consequences of the pandemic. 

It was just a phone call we had left to contact our family and friends. Here is one of the times where we appreciate technology. In general, we learn to appreciate little things and become grateful. The pandemic was a teacher as well. 

Having a baby, bringing a human being to our life, to our home, into our daily routine was very transformative. It is a process. It is a blessing and joyful but was not easy. It’s a lot of work and requires a lot of adjustments. 

They say “it takes a village to raise a child”. There were no close family and friends for us let alone a village at that very moment. 

However, it is also said, “days are long but years are short”. It is so true!! I had many long days where I was tired, in pain, or crying but I don’t know how the year flew by. 

Now, it has been more than a year and we have celebrated our baby’s first birthday. Both I and my husband have learned and grown a lot in just one year and a few months of being parents. 

Also, the pandemic was the time we learned to see things from a different perspective. For our family, the pandemic gives us opportunities, which we are always grateful for. My husband started working from home and we got a chance to raise our child together side by side. Things happened for a reason!! 

Mamas, I am here to tell you all about how to prepare for postpartum, what to expect, what has helped me, and some empowering thoughts.  

What is Postpartum? How does it look? and What to expect?

Postpartum is just the period after childbirth. Anyone who knows how difficult childbirth is, knows how postpartum is a crucial time for a mom’s recovery. 

In ancient cultures, including in Ethiopia, there is a culture to take care of moms during postpartum. In most of these countries, mom will be pampered and rested at least for 40 days. Families, relatives, and friends will take care of house chores, help with the new baby, and prepare nourishing foods for the mother. 

Most of us who live in Western countries don’t get that kind of luxury. This adds to all other postpartum issues we face. 

Postpartum is basically after birth recovery. But it may come with some health problems that could occur after birth. It may also involve emotional and hormonal changes including postpartum depression. Let’s see them one by one: 

Lochia

Lochia is bleeding and discharge after birth caused by tissue shedding and uterus shrinking. It is different from a period, and you will have lochia whether you have a vaginal or cesarean birth. 

• Bleeding can be heavy at first and decrease over time 
• It can last up to 6 weeks 
• You might see blood clots in lochia. It is normal as long as it is small and less frequent.
• The color of discharge gradually changes from red to brown to white 

If you have sudden heavy bleeding or soak one or more pads within an hour, if you pass clots larger than a ping-pong ball, and have severe abdominal pain or cramping, contact your healthcare provider. 

After Pain

Your uterus shrinks back to its pre-pregnancy size. Therefore you may feel contractions, which is what after pain means. 

These are weaker than labor contractions and can feel a bit stronger while you are breastfeeding as it is related to hormones that are released during breastfeeding. 

Your uterus gets back to its pre-pregnancy size in 6 weeks time. The intensity of pain decreases day by day. You can ease afterpains by:

• Using your labor breathing techniques 
• Emptying your bladder before breastfeeding 
• Placing a heating pad on your belly
• Taking pain medication (make sure it’s safe for breastfeeding)

Constipation and Hemorrhoids

It is common to become constipated. Constipation can cause or worsen hemorrhoids. You can use laxatives or change your diet. 

Hemorrhoids are enlarged veins in the anus that commonly occur during pregnancy and after childbirth. 

In Ethiopia, I believe that is one of the reasons ground flaxseed is prepared as a drink and given to moms at the last month of pregnancy and after delivery. 

These can help to prevent or relieve constipation and hemorrhoids:

• Drink plenty of water 
• Eat a lot of fiber-rich foods: vegetables, fruits, whole grains. As mentioned above, you can include flaxseed or chia seeds in your diet. 
• Don’t resist the urge to have a bowel movement. The longer you wait, the higher the chance of constipation.  

Postpartum Infections 

There are risks of infections after childbirth. It is important to care for your vaginal area, perineal, stitches (if you have any), or your incision if you have a cesarean birth. 

Do this to avoid infections: 

• Take your medication that your doctor prescribed as directed
• Take Sitz/Epsom salt baths. Or sit on a tub that fits on your toilet and soak in Sitz/Epsom salt with warm water
• Wipe yourself from front to back. Also, use warm water to clean the vaginal area after urinating. This is especially essential if you have stitches. 
• Avoid using tampons or menstrual cups. Just use cotton/cloth pads. You can also apply witch hazel on the pad. 
• Wait at least for 6 weeks to resume sex. Consulting your doctor and get examined before resuming sex is recommended.  

Sign of Postpartum Infections/Warnings 

• Lochia with foul-smelling odor  
• Temperature of 100.4℉ (38℃) or more
• Increasing drainage from the area around your stitches (for moms who have stitches)
• Bleeding, fluid, swelling, separation around edges of your incision (for moms who have cesarean birth) 

Postpartum Preeclampsia

It is a rare condition that can develop within the first 48-72 hours after delivery. In very rare cases, preeclampsia can occur up to 4-6 weeks postpartum. 

Sign of Postpartum Preeclampsia

• Sudden swelling of face or limbs 
• High blood pressure 
• Nausea or vomiting 
• Severe headache 
• Very little urine
• Sudden shortness of breath  

If you have any signs of infections or preeclampsia, you have to contact your healthcare provider and get treated. 

Body Image After Postpartum

Mama, after childbirth, your body image you have in your mind might not be the same as before, but just know your body is beautiful as it is. Your body was working so hard for nine plus months to grow your precious baby, this body was the one which protects and nurtures your baby. 

Your body gives life!! 

You shall be thankful about your body and embrace it.

The weight gain, or the stretch mark, or the hair loss and any other changes on your body never trade off the love of your baby.  

If you don’t like your weight or shape that you have after birth, first get healed, and then you will have time to work on it. On top of the long list of breastfeeding benefits, it can help to lose pregnancy weight.      

Postpartum Emotions and Hormones

Baby Blues

It is feeling stressed, sad, anxious, lonely, tired, or weepy after the baby’s birth. 

Mama, it is normal to feel emotional. There are changing hormones, distribution of sleep, and responding to your baby’s need on top of after pain. It is understandable, give it time. Baby blues shall pass after a few weeks. 

I have experienced baby blues. I was very tired because I had a three days long labor. I also have some pain from my stitches. I was sad and confused about the pandemic and the whole timing as I explained above. Plus coping with baby needs was not easy the first few weeks. 

I, my husband, and the baby gradually figured it out and we found solutions for the issues one thing at a time. Keep reading, I will tell what has helped me and the lessons I got from my experience. 

Postpartum Depression (PPD) 

As said above, It’s common for a mother to experience the “baby blues”. Unlike the baby blues, PPD doesn’t go away on its own. It can appear days or even months after delivering a baby; it can last for many weeks or months if left untreated. PPD can make it hard for you to get through the day, and it can affect your ability to take care of your baby and yourself. 

According to American Psychological Association (APA), up to 1 in 7, experience a much more serious mood disorder, PPD. 

1 in 7!! This means it is not something that happens rarely. It could happen to many of us or already happened.  

PPD is postpartum psychosis, a condition that may involve psychotic symptoms like delusions or hallucinations (seeing things that are not there)

PPD can happen to any mother. Women with easy pregnancies or problem pregnancies, first-time mothers and mothers with one or more children, women who are married, and women who are not, and regardless of income, age, race or ethnicity, culture, or education.

Symptoms of PPD 

• Excess worries and anxiety 
• Not finding pleasure in things you used to enjoy 
• Excess crying and sadness 
• Inability to sleep even when you’re exhausted 
• Change in your appetite 
• Thoughts of harming your baby or yourself 
• Having hallucinations

I don’t think I had PPD as my baby blues faded away in a few weeks. Though I sympathize with mothers who have experienced severe PPD. Because even if I haven’t had the symptoms of PPD, or what I have experienced don’t last for long and I get it over, I believe we all moms experience PPD on some levels. 

Due to low awareness and stigma of mental health in many cultures, most cases of PPD might never be reported. Or we might not even recognize it as a problem and get help. 

I urge any mom who thinks has PPD or notices some of the symptoms to contact your healthcare provider. Or tell your family and friends about your feelings. Whatever it takes you to need to get help. And it is better to be safe than sorry!! 

My Thoughts and What Has Helped Me During Postpartum 

1. Postpartum Recovery Essential 

Stock up postpartum recovery essentials to properly take care of yourself, avoid infections, and reduce after pain. I like Frida’s postpartum kit. This company’s kit includes everything you need in one pack. 

2. Meal Prep or Batch Cooking 

If possible, make meal prep and cooking on the last day of your pregnancy and stock up. If not, batch cook whenever you get time. Double the size of the recipe so you can use it for a few more days than cooking every single day.   

3. Just Know You Can’t Do It All 

I wish somebody had told me this early on. 

As a woman, we tend to do everything. Doing the house chore, taking care of the baby, comforting partner, answering calls, etc. And we want to be perfect in everything. 

Let me tell you, mama, you can’t do it all and you don’t have to!! It is okay to prioritize. You’re a human being and you just have a baby. You need to rest!! 

You need time to adjust to motherhood. You need time to bond with your brand new baby. You even need time with your partner to adjust to parenthood. He also became a father. You both need time to figure out who does what and share responsibilities. 

Even if it is not your first time and you’re having 2nd or 3rd or any other number of babies, you are just adding a human being into the family so you need time to process and adjust. 

4. It is Okay to Ask for Help 

This is huge. Most people struggle to ask for help or accept help when others offer it. 

I have to confess I also struggle with this. I don’t know why we struggle with it but what I learn is, it is okay to ask for or accept help. 

I am telling you, mama, there are days you need one. Just remember, it is okay to ask or accept help!! So call your friend or family members and ask what you need. 

You know what, most of the time you get what you want. And most people are happy to help a new mom.

I remember one day, I crave injera and wet (any kind) that is packed in a launch box like how we do it back home, Ethiopia that we pack all kind of food prepared for a party in a large lunch box and send to for people who couldn’t make it or elderly people who can’t go out. 

I have memories of eating with my grandma on many occasions. So I don’t know why I craved it one day. Then I called someone whom I know will prepare what I craved nicely. She was so happy I made the call and asked her as she was offering to help all the time. My husband went to her house and brought it. I don’t forget how I enjoyed eating it. 

5. Take Care of Yourself

Mama, you need to take care of yourself as you take care of your baby. You can only be a good mom and can show up best for your baby when you’re well.

You have to eat wholesome real foods as you were eating during pregnancy. Your body is still raising a baby through your breast milk. Even if you don’t breastfeed, you need food for your body to properly heal. Have a snack by your bedside. Eat nutritious food. Drink a lot of fluid. 

You need to sleep. I can’t stress this enough. I know it is difficult and there is a new schedule with the baby but you have to make time. You can also sleep when the baby sleeps. The piles of dishes in the sink or the laundry can wait!! You rest now and take care of that later. 

Take a bath with the baby. It might sound scary to bathe with a newborn, but trust me and try it. You can do it, it is fun!! I was also scared to try but once I did, I never bathed my baby alone. Sometimes we even take baths with daddy together.  

Once in a while, give the baby to daddy, or when the baby sleeps, or when someone holds your baby for some time, take a warm bath alone, soak in the tub and pamper yourself. Just enjoy being with yourself. (Herbal bath, Epsom salt also helps for healing) 

6. Avoid Negativity 

Postpartum can be hormonal as I said above, and it is a huge transformation in your life. You don’t need negative talk, news, drama, etc to waste your energy on. Enjoy your precious moment with your new bundle of joy, snuggle, and soak in the love!! 

As I mentioned above I gave birth at the start of the coronavirus pandemic so it was difficult to stay away from the news. I remember it was making me stressed out excessively.  

One night I had a bad nightmare and quickly realized I don’t need to watch the news every single day and stress out about the things I don’t have control of. 

So I stopped watching the news, focused on the fact over fear, and did the things I can do in my control.  

I also started watching entertaining things, listening to inspirational and uplifting audios and started taking short walks. It did help me so much to change my focus and contain my energy. 

7. Talk ith Your Partner or Join a Moms Group

Mama, as I said repeatedly it is common and okay to get emotional. Your body is going through a lot. Talking about your emotions and feelings with your partner can help. My husband is like my therapist. I talk to him all the time. It also helps us to understand each other better and grow in our relationship. 

I also have a moms group online. I have a couple of Facebook groups and mom’s accounts I follow on Instagram, which helped me to relate and get information. I hope EnatHood also serves in that way. 

Finally, mamas whatever you’re going through during postpartum, it won’t last forever. Focus on what is important and take care of yourself. I hope all the information and resources above help. I wish you a wonderful time with your baby and a fast recovery. 

Let me know in the comment below about your postpartum experience and what has helped you. 

Sources:

• INJOY health education
• American Psychological Association