We, Mothers, Recognize Father’s Role

Even though we may not mention it enough, we, mothers, recognize the father’s role in parenting. We know we are on the journey of parenthood together. We can’t do it alone. 

Mother and father’s roles can’t be replaced by one another. A mother can’t be a father, and vice versa.

Often in society, the role of a mother or a father can be defined unconsciously and limited in a box. I think there are many things we can question in these distinctions. 

Traditionally, fathers have the cultural image of breadwinners, disciplinarians, and authority figures. When you were growing up, how often did you hear your mother say, “just wait until your father gets home!”

I feel fathers are left out because they are not allowed to be intimate, present, and involved in children’s daily lives. That interferes with both their ability to express affection and our ability to recognize it.

On the other side, mothers are overcrowded. Our society expects mothers to play both father and mother roles. She is expected to be involved in children’s daily lives, be a good housekeeper, support her family financially, and be present and affectionate.  

It can’t be denied our culture is changing, and these days more fathers are involved in parenting directly and intimately.

While I am happy about the change, when we are evolving, on one side, fathers are blamed and criticized altogether for not playing their role. On the other hand, people are over-surprised when fathers start playing their part. 

I feel something is off here. And I feel like we take the extreme of the spectrum and get things complicated. 

If society does not allow fathers to play their parenting role, they should not be blamed. But it is also better if fathers are not silent when their position is taken. 

I noticed some fatherhood confusion and my modest proposal for a change. So that both mothers and fathers play their part and our children get what they deserve from their parents. 

Let’s Allow Fathers to Be FATHER 

I don’t understand why people get so surprised when fathers actively participate in parenting.

If the father plays his role correctly and does the right things, he gets extra attention and amusement, as if he did something out of the ordinary. Isn’t that what he was supposed to do? And what do we want them to do?

When people see my husband change a diaper, they get so surprised, as if he is doing a favor for me, and try to tell me how I am lucky or look at him with a pitiful “poor guy” look.

Also, people often ask me if my husband helps me with house chores.

We live together under the same roof, so house chores are not just for me but all of us. We all do tasks. Every one of us is better at something than the other. So often, focusing on what we are best at might be ideal, which is fine.

For example, I am better at cooking than my husband, so I cook for my family and enjoy it. But it doesn’t mean he never cooks. He cooks a notable amount of times a week. He is a morning person, so he cooks breakfast most of the time.

I am not good at laundry, especially folding clothes; I’m not too fond of it. My husband does that most of the time; it doesn’t mean I never do laundry.

The other is I am often asked if my husband babysits our baby. I get confused about answering this question.

My husband is the father of our children. He doesn’t babysit his OWN babies; instead, he is parenting. husband is the father of our baby. He doesn’t babysit his baby; instead, he is parenting. 

Whether I am around or not, they spend time together as a father and a son. I can’t be a father to our son, as my husband can’t be a mother. We are playing our roles separately and parenting together.

When a father shows his emotions or expresses affection for his child, he gets labeled and told: “he is acting like a mother.” That sounds like fathers don’t have feelings or are not allowed.

Therefore, I think it is better if we, as a society, allow fathers to play their role, be involved in children’s daily lives, and express affection.

I support proper appreciation and recognition of fathers for actively participating in parenting. That’s what this post is about.

As I believe one day of the “Mother’s Day” celebration is not enough, I also think “Father’s Day” should not be something we do for only a single day to honor fathers and forget them the whole year.

I believe fathers work every single day, every hour, and every minute of the year. They are also raising human beings, shaping human minds and hearts.

Happy Father’s Day, Today, and Every Single Day 

Therefore, I would like to say
For all fathers,
Stepfathers,
Grandfathers and great grandfather,
For fathers who lost their children,
For fathers soon-to-be,
For men who are showing up as father figure for children,

Happy Father’s Day, today, and every single day. The world appreciates and recognizes your hard work. We, mothers, do appreciate you!!

Tell me in the comment below about the fatherhood role that you appreciate. Do you also notice things that need to be changed? I would love to know your thoughts.